STOP FORCING THE PERFECT ROUTINE - START LISTENING TO YOURSELF

Have you ever felt guilty because you didn’t wake up at 5 am, meditate for 20 minutes, journal your intentions, do a cold shower, drink warm lemon water, and then smash a green smoothie before the rest of the world even opens their eyes?

Yeah, me too.

We live in a time where self-improvement advice is everywhere. It seems like every other post or podcast is preaching a new “life-changing” habit. Don’t get me wrong—these practices can be incredibly supportive. But here’s something I wish more people would say out loud:

There is no single routine or practice that works for everyone. Even the healthiest habits won’t feel right for everybody—or every life.

The Trap of “One-Size-Fits-All” Wellness

What often starts as inspiration can quickly turn into pressure. We see others thriving with a certain routine and think: If only I could do that too, I’d feel better. I’d finally be calm, energized, focused, productive… enough.

So we try. We follow the steps. We squeeze that 90-minute morning routine between the school drop-off and work, or we try to force ourselves to journal and stretch even when all we want to do is sleep.

And when it doesn’t work? We feel frustrated. Discouraged. Even ashamed. Like, there’s something wrong with us for not being able to stick to something “simple” that supposedly helps so many others.

But maybe the problem isn’t you. Maybe the problem is the expectation that there’s a universal formula for feeling good.

There Is No “Right” Routine

We’re all built differently. We have different bodies, different temperaments, different life schedules, energy levels, work demands, parenting realities, and sleep needs.

What feels nourishing for one person might feel exhausting to another.

Even something like the morning routine - which is often held up as the holy grail of success and wellness - can turn into yet another item on our never-ending to-do list.

Not everyone is a morning person. Not everyone has an hour of quiet before the rest of the house wakes up. And not everyone thrives by jumping straight into movement or mindfulness before coffee. And that’s okay.

In fact, I find that my most grounded time is in the evening, after the day winds down. Or during their lunch break, when I can take a quiet walk or pause for a few minutes of deep breathing.

Wellness Shouldn’t Feel Like a Chore

The key here is simple but powerful: your routine should support you - not stress you out.

If you feel more anxious trying to keep up with your wellness practices than you did before starting them… something’s off.

Well-being isn’t about ticking boxes or doing what others tell you to do. It’s about building a relationship with yourself—one where you pay attention to how things feel in your body, mind, and heart.

Ask yourself:

• Does this habit actually give me more energy?

• Do I feel calmer or clearer afterward?

• Or am I doing it because I feel like I should?

Experiment with Curiosity

Rather than blindly following someone else’s ideal routine, try exploring what works for you with curiosity and compassion.

You might start by choosing just one thing that seems inspiring or supportive. Maybe it’s taking a few deep breaths when you wake up. Or lighting a candle while you drink your coffee. Or walking around the block after lunch.

Try it. Feel into it. Keep it if it helps. Let it go if it doesn’t.

It’s not failure to stop doing something that doesn’t serve you—it’s wisdom.

This is how you build a sustainable routine: one small, honest choice at a time.

My Own Approach

Over the years, my own routines have shifted a lot. Sometimes I’m really consistent with certain practices. Other times, I have to let them go and try something new. And that’s okay.

What I’ve learned is that the most powerful shift comes when you start listening to your own rhythm.

When you stop trying to force yourself into someone else’s mold, and instead build a life that feels good in your body, your mind, your heart.

That’s real wellness.

Need support finding what works for you?

If you'd like guidance and a space to explore what truly supports your well-being—on your terms—I'm here to help. I offer a limited number of free 1-hour sessions where we can look together at your daily life, your challenges, and your natural rhythm, and begin building a path that feels aligned and sustainable.

You can book your free session here and take the first gentle step toward your own version of balance and vitality.